Diaries of a Fatman

Well I'm going to start something new, "diaries of a fat mad man" like tonight is a very busy night, I have gained much weight since last year, as I have gotten stuck in 26 chimneys and fell through 634 roofs and flattened the tires on 13 mobile homes, and all my reindeer have bad backs from pulling my ass!!! I used to think I was big-boned but have yet to see a fat skeleton!!!